Smoking

Smoking was my favorite thing to do before. Actually that was the only thing I take seriously.. I used to do it a lot.. Anytime I feel that I'm not doing anything (which is most of the time by the way) I smoke. I vent out all my anxieties by smoking (hence the title of this blog). And it was just recently that I trimmed down my yosi intake. From about half pack a day, I'm down to 1 stick every after two days.. And that is subject to my bestfriend's approval pa ha! Actually now, I haven't taken yosi for about a week and 5 days na! Grabe.. and I'm doing this because of some insane reason.. Pero everytime I think about it, a lot of people already asked me to quit before and I didn't.. I think because I can't. I'm too much hooked to it that saying "no" to it would mean that I would be depriving myself of the thing I enjoy the most. I don't know why now that I find it easy not to smoke when before I can't even bear to think of not smoking.. I can't even believe that when Nic asked me to stop I said "sure" right away! Trimming it down was hard.. There was a time when I tried to quit right away I had head aches and I always feel like vomitting.. I think its what you call "withdrawal syndrome", when your body is adjusting to the sudden changes in your habits. Then I thought of not really stopping but trimming it down to 1 stick every other day.. This was more effective coz I think that my body can adjust much better if I still take it sometimes. Now, I miss my yosi friends coz that was the reason why we hang out a lot. I had a lot of really interesting and cool conversations over yosi. When I think of it, I really don't understand why I'm trimming it down and why I can trim it down now. I think that it really is because I really wanted to stop and that I realize that I'm better off smoking.. and the most important reason is because someone is helping me to quit.. I'm not saying that I'll be 100% yosi free from now on coz that would be too hard but I'm getting there..